Think of something you want.
Is it a new car? A house? A partner? A new job?
I know you think that’s what you want, but it’s actually not.
Stick with me here.
The only reason we want anything is because of how we think it will make us feel.
The thing that you actually want is a feeling.
Let me tell a story to demonstrate this.
When I was in high school, I got my drivers license (lol, seemingly less common for high schoolers these days).
Now I could drive, but I was stuck driving the family minivan on the rare occasion it was available. Not terribly cool.
I dreamed of the day that I had a car of my own to drive.
Can you even imagine?? How amazing would it be to have your VERY OWN CAR?
If I had my very own car I could drive anywhere I wanted, whenever I wanted. I was certain that I would never have a problem again in my life if only I had my own car.
I thought that what I needed was a car, but the only reason I wanted a car was to feel my own freedom.
Let’s pause the story here. Do you have a car? Are you able to drive anywhere you want? Has this solved every problem you’ve ever had?
I’m guessing it hasn’t.
Isn’t it frustrating when you spend your whole life chasing milestones and the achievement of them doesn’t solve all your problems?
I thought I would be so much happier when I finally made it to high school. Whoops, still not happy. It’s probably just that I will be happier when I finish high school. Nope. That didn’t work. Graduating college will definitely do it. Hmmm… Wasn’t that either. The 6-figure salary will undoubtably make me happy. …nope.
We chase all these milestones, but the feeling we get from them doesn’t last forever.
The next time you think you need something outside of you to happen to feel differently, take a step back and try to identify the feeling that you are seeking.
Is there a way you can create that feeling for yourself right now?
Can you find any evidence that you are already successful, or lucky, or skilled, or that you’ve already “arrived?”
Take a look at the feelings you’re chasing, and see if you can create them right now.
If you want to go DEEP on this, this is the work I do with my clients. We find out what they are looking for, and we get it for them right away. It’s incredible, and it will completely change your life.
Get started at amberdeibert.com/consult