Have you ever wondered what causes your emotions? I know I hadn’t.
I just assumed it was all the people around me.
If someone did something rude, I felt hurt. If someone did something nice, I felt loved.
This is a very anxiety-inducing way to live your life.
You never know how the people around you are going to act, so you never know how you are going to feel.
And then I learned what actually causes my emotions. (Hint: it isn’t other people at all).
The thing that causes an emotion is one little sneaky sentence.
Try this out.
I want you to think the thought, “I just made a complete fool of myself.”
How does it feel?
(Sorry, by the way, for putting that thought in your head).
I bet it feels kind of terrible.
Next, I want you to think of someone who you know loves you, and think, “{insert their name here} loves me so much.”
How does that one feel?
Better, right?
Okay, wait. You didn’t have any reason at all to think either of those thoughts. I just planted them in your head.
And those small little sentences changed how you were feeling in a matter of seconds. Did you feel it?
Your feelings are caused by your thoughts.
No one else has any control to make you feel a certain way. It’s your thoughts that cause your feelings.
You might be thinking, “no, no, no… You’ve got this all wrong, Amber. That person MADE me feel mad when they cut me off in traffic.”
Actually, your thought about them is what made you feel mad.
You might have thought, “that person was trying to harm me.” Or “that person just put my life at risk.” And it was just the one sentence that you thought that caused you to feel mad.
What if the person who cut you off in traffic was one of your close friends. Would you still be mad? My guess is that you wouldn’t. But the fact remains the same, someone cut you off. The only thing that is different is your thought about it.
Your thoughts cause your feelings.
The next time you are feeling an emotion, stop and try to figure out what the one sentence behind that feeling is.
If you’re ready to take this to the next level, and become in complete control of your feelings, I want to coach you. This work is life-altering.
Get started at amberdeibert.com/consult